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Well, space is cold. It's so ******* lonely
And though I'm bold. I'm pretty ******* homely
I got a heavy load. It's ******* overwhelming
And I may explode. This mother******* ship I'm helming

I had a rough day at work
And my back really hurts
The crew don't take me seriously they just look at me and smirk
I'll just go back to my quarters and jerk my Kirk

You pass me in the corridors
You never ever notice me lurking
I'm spending all my time alone
Nobody knows how hard I'm working it
I wanna take a voyage home
'Cause right now I'm going berserk and
The places where my fantasies roam
Have got my blood burning

I had a rough day at work
And my back really hurts
I'm gonna quit star fleet and be a mother******* file clerk
Or just go back to my quarters and jerk my Kirk

All by myself
In my own private hell
My quarters are a dungeon
And my mind is a cell
Where I'm locked up tight
Alone every night
Losing the battle of a Pon farr fight
And I can't get control
I'm never ever done
I can't let go of my own number one
But I try
God I try
If I could just stop and re-supply
But I know
I'm never gonna stop
Jerking my Kirk 'til the day I drop
And I know nothing works
I'm always gonna have to jerk my Kirk

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