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SHAKIRA:
I sing like a goat
The frog in my throat
Has lived there for years
And he makes me sing this way
I set up a bed
Down by the steps
So when I run down stairs
I don't crash and smash my head
I really have to pee now
But I cannnot leave because
I'm waitting for Rihanna
Where is that ho?
This is our girls night
I send her an e-vite
To have a slumber party, party
At my house
Oh oh ooh oh oh
I'm very frio!
I keep forgetting to put clohes on
Rock and Roll!
Guitar solo!
I had to start a band with no one
The evil throat froggy
He put a curse on me
Now I must live in this big house alone
Hey Rihanna!
Where the hell are ya?
Don't piss me off or I'll unfriend you

RIHANNA:
Sorry I' m late
I was a harrassed at the gate
Your house is a maze
Don't know why you need all this space
We're smoking in bed
Bitchin' bout men
Our asses look great
But we can't find a decent mate
It really makes me feel bad
Got issues with my dad
And it makes me date such assholes

SHAKIRA:
Oh not again
Let's play a board game
Like Scattergorries
And I will make us nachos, nachos
Where'd she go?
Hey Rihanna!
I think I lost ya

RIHANNA:
I took a wrong turn on the bathroom

SHAKIRA:
Make a left

RIHANNA:
Hey Shakira
I cannot hear ya

SHAKIRA:
Just stay put my butt will find your butt
Communicate with me
With ass telepathy
Now we're dry humping the dry wall

RIHANNA:
Why can't I rebound
From stupid Chris Brown

SHAKIRA:
You keep forgetting he's an ass clown

RIHANNA:
I'd kill and I'd steal
And I cheat on my taxes
And french kiss a frog for that boy

SHAKIRA:
Really?

RIHANNA:
I'd eat a fart sandwich and lie down in traffic

SHAKIRA:
He battered you like a nerf toy
I have a solution a man subtitution
Have you met my friend, the bullfrog?
Just reach down and kiss him
He'll become a prince
He won't treat you like a lap dog

RIHANNA:
Ohh noo!

SHAKIRA:
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
Now the evil frog has cursed you

RIHANNA:
What is that noise?

SHAKIRA:
That's your new voice
And now I sound the way I used to sound

RIHANNA:
How do I stop this hell?
This vocal prison cell

SHAKIRA:
You have to pass the curse to someone else
Well this is goodbye
My hips don't lie

RIHANNA:
You kind of sound like Julie Andrews

SHAKIRA:
Thank you!

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