Walking around the town,
feeling like a clown.
Can't remember the last time,
you had some real action...

Try to get a whore,
but they laugh at you through the door
You're almost as pathetic,
as Michael Jackson.

You got your cell phone,
no numbers to do the talking.
Better to find a solution,
so keep on walking

Got no erection issues,
spending let’s of tissues.
Take snake to zoo,
need a woman boo hoo.

If you can't get sex,
go to place marked triple X
and buy yourself
a brand new magic friend!

CHORUS:
If you got no one to say "moshi moshi"
you can jerk off with your Japanese
Latex... Pussy!
(2x)

Ya spanked the monkey twice,
ya spanked yer monkey nice.
Ya spanked it so goddamn hard,
it bleeds like the christ.

Still you kinda like the pain,
when there's no extra weight to gain.
Hot chicks start to want you,
real bad!

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