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Who put the dirt in charge of the merch
It wasn't Wednesday, fester or lurch
Some rhubarb for Sam and Bob
While I stepped out to audit the church

Beer and loathing
Cosmos is exploding
The audience are sporting a tam
Every stinking Sam

Screened by the band out in the van
Every tam pom was glued by hand
Some rhubarb for Sam and Bob
Target frillies bobbed by a wee tail of lamb

Beer and loathing
Cosmos is exploding
The audience are sporting a tam
Every stinking Sam

Up there (Beer and loathing)
On your hair
It's underwear (Cosmos is exploding)
That you wear

Up there (Beer and loathing)
On your hair
It's underwear (Cosmos is exploding)
Underwear

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