I was sitting on the front porch, playing a song
Listening to the chainsaws and singing along
Saw animals acting crazy like there was something wrong
But I didn't see nothing to be afraid of

Deer doing pirhouettes all around my car
Doves behaving more promiscuously than they usually are
A squirrel tried to hide inside my guitar
That's when I forgot the song I was singing

I set my instrument down and looked him in the eye
Said I don't like rodents, mister, so you'd better fly
And he did, and I didn't notice the ashes falling from the sky
I felt so triumphant

Yeah, with a smile on my face I took a deep breath
Choked on black smoke and stumbled to the left
Which was a good thing cause on the right, rumbling for my death
Was a bulldozer which crushed my guitar

There's something in the air
Something singing Fare thee well
There's something you should know
Something singing low out there

Now, running from this behemoth intent on my destruction
I began to change my opinion of construction
Granted I don't own my house or the land it's on
But headed for the trees and noticing they were all gone

It occured to me that now I had no place to hide
So as a last resort I spun around and headed back inside
Dozer hot on my heels, afraid for my hide
I was dismayed to find that my house was also gone

And in its place stood a Best Buy store
With construction beginning on two or three more
Bloodthirsty bulldozer rushed past me with a roar
To attack the original, cause it had already folded

It was now that I realized what I'd previously missed
Strumming my guitar in bucolic bliss
I thought, The End Times will surely look like this
And they'll be sponsored by Caterpillar.

There's something in the air
Something singing Fare thee well
There's something you should know
Something singing low out there

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