I'll share with you the tale of when I met some baggy-trousered gentlemen They spoke with flair and with panache They all had beards but no moustache
They had a book called the Qur'an containing some divine and cosmic plan And then I cringed in fear and dread as one closed up his book and said
Just do it Just do it Do it before you die Join Islam, come on man Don't upset the man in the sky The consequences are dire You'll really piss him off and then he'll burn you in the fire Just do it Just do it now!
So I said: I can't do it I can't do it I really don't believe in God Your passion and your fashion I really think are really rather odd
No derision It's my decision and I don't like the idea of a circumcision I won't do it I won't join Islam.
Join Islam Read the Qur'an Linguistically it's sublime I've checked and It's perfect In every way and for all time It's righteous It has no likeness Here's a verse with forty-two rhetorical devices Just do it Join Islam now!
And I said: I can't do it I can't do it I've never felt the need to pray On a carpet with a view of men's arses I'm sorry I don't pray that way I'm at a disadvantage I can't read the language All I want is lager and a bacon sandwich I can't do it I won't join Islam
And he said I won't boast but first and foremost ask yourself what if you're wrong. You believe that something came from nothing? My faith could never be that strong! It's not pragmatic It's un-Quranic It violates the second law of thermodynamics Think about it But don't take too long
And I said: I can't do it I can't do it Not without some evidence I'm not biassed Just give me science None of you are making sense It's not for me, man Leave me be, man I'd rather pour a glass and drink my daddy's semen I can't do it I won't join Islam
And they said "Brother makes a good point" Join islam But only if you feel inclined Our obsession is freedom of expression Just say whatever's on your mind
It's splendid We commend it, But we reserve the right to never be offended Join islam Join islam now
And I said: I can't do it I can't do it I believe in equality It's a given: rights for women have no place in your ideology No integration No education The only thing your females get is genital mutilation That's final I won't join Islam
And they said: Join Islam Just do it The moment is so opportune Our practice: To blacklist every novel and cartoon
Keep silent We're strident We'll chop the head off anyone who says we're violent Join Islam Just do it NOW!
And I said: I can't do it I can't do it Censorship I Despise It's fair to declare the universal right to criticize
I don't want Sharia round here I'd rather pack my bags and move to North Korea I won't do it I won't join Islam
And they said: Join Islam Just do it Western women are all whores Here's my sister No man has kissed her Join us and she'll be all yours
She's no shirker A real hard worker She'll show you everything she's got beneath her burqa Just do it! Join Islam now!
And I said: ALRIGHT!! I'll do it I'm a red-blooded male It's intriguing I'm pleading to find out what's behind her veil
To Allah I give my shahada I'm in a state of frenzy and a lustful lather I'll do it! I'll do it now!
I've done it I'm ready to bang her like a man possessed I'm burning I'm yearning As she slowly gets undressed Uh oh! I stammer I piss my pyjamas Cos she's bog-eyed and her face is like a bag of hammers I can't do it I wanna leave Islam!
Allahu akbar, It says here Terms and conditions apply One small penalty for apostasy Leave and you must die
There's no compulsion in religion But revoking your shahada gets you crucifixion You've done it You've done it now!Teksty umieszczone na naszej stronie są własnością wytwórni, wykonawców, osób mających do nich prawa.
