---

[DUDLEY MALONE]
If we were married, I'd promise to cherish you just as a gentleman should

[DORIS]
If we were married, I'd promise to forfeit my legal autonomy for good

[DUDLEY MALONE]
If we were married, we'd buy our own acre of land for our own little house

[DORIS]
If we were married, our possessions and property would solely belong to the masculine spouse
If we were married

[DUDLEY MALONE]
If we were married

[DUDLEY MALONE & DORIS]
If wе were married

[DUDLEY MALONE]
If wе were married, we'd fill out our family and life would simply sublime

[DORIS]
If we were married, I'd churn out your children 'cause contraception's a federal crime

[DUDLEY MALONE]
If we were married, we'd save up a nest egg to cushion us later in life

[DORIS]
If we were married, my earnings would be in your name and I couldn't control my own spending, or open a bank account, or sign a contract, or hire a lawyer because, economically speaking, I'd die by becoming your wife
If we were married

[DUDLEY MALONE]
If we were married

[DUDLEY MALONE & DORIS]
If we were married

[DORIS]
You've gotta admire the ease with which men can squeeze us into such a rigid role

[DUDLEY MALONE, spoken]
You do?

[DORIS]
Daughters are taught to aspire to a system expressly designed to keep 'em under control
For instance
If we were married and you physically beat me, that wouldn't be illegal to do

[DUDLEY MALONE, spoken]
What?

[DORIS]
Can you believe it is 1916 and all of these things are still actually true

[DUDLEY MALONE]
I suppose I never stopped to think about how it would be for you
If we were married

[DORIS]
If we were married

[DUDLEY MALONE & DORIS]
If we were married

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