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O / Organized Chaos / Antidote


"Now that she is gone, I have no will to carry on. No more numbness….just pain"

"Picking up the pieces of time past.All that was, and all the wounds will never mend, All that should be is torn asunder. I’m trying harder, but whom to turn to, when she was all, when she is now gone? After all that has been, after all the hiding, the trying, the fighting, the lying, and the pain forms a wall, and it forms a mask, forms sweet duality. Behind, I hide. Building an urge to seek for comfort, unborn god and unnamed religion. Seeking for shreds of memory that I left inside.

I bleed
I fall
I know
Some things will never change

The more I tend to rise
The more I crave to fall

Every night the dream is the same
I long to stay in the velvet sleep
Never again to feel
The pain of awakening

Now I sit alone
Like a cold and bitter stone
Waiting for a sign
In the desert of denial

Still feeling the pain,
the pain reappears
visions of two springs collide
never before to fell
the ache of wondering

The pain won’t seize to end
I got to find the remedy
Seeking what I cannot find nor
Grasp, and it’s puling me
Down, down into that trip again

Hallo baby, it’s good to see you here
Sit down, grab a drink, stay for a night.
I know it’s too fast and strange but
Sit back, enjoy the ride. What’s that?
Come on, but just don’t stop
Believing that it’s true
Hold me, sorry, I don’t feel a thing
I’m feeling sadder and sadder
No! I need to be happy,
Or just to feel depressed again?

Wondering where you are
I wish to be with you
Still I love you so
A silent cry in the night
Will be wept unheard, again

I bleed
I fall
I know
Some things will never change
The more I tend to rise
The more I crave to fall

Burn it away, take it away,
Fake it away, it’s ticking away
Feel the need to pretend
I’m behind the mask, I’m behind the wall
Always fighting between my selves
Regretting all I have and haven’t ever done

Every night the dream is the same
I long to stay in the velvet sleep
Never again to feel
The pain of awakening

As the city lights still flicker down below
With all its glorious insignificant glow
One light is slowly fading away
And no one knows
No one should know that
"Still I love you so"
A silent cry in the night
Will be left unheard…
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