His name is Melvin Junko
A 98 pound nerd
He got picked and teased
Got treated like Joe Fleishaker’s turd

They tricked him into a pink tutu
Chased him down with evil smiles
He fell out the window into toxic goo
And now he’s got a twisted eye

Hideously deformed
With superhuman size and strength
Tromatons tingle around all evil
Toxie’s gonna bash their brains like a bollweevil!

One day he stops a robbery
Saves a blind melon-heavy gyno, Sarah
He takes her home, they get slobbery
Get down with some hot toxic fuckin’

Pre-chorus:
Environmental superhumanhero
Pride & joy of Tromaville
Radioactive mop in hand
Saving the little people (and the Lloyd family)

Tromaville is being threatened
Dr. Killemoff has a planned invasion
Pollute every inch of town
Smogulan invasion is going down!

Toxie’s got some friends to stop Killemoff
More mutants of superhuman stregnth
Nozone, Junkyard, Headbanger, Major Disaster,
And who could forget… SNAILMAN!!

But then the show got cancelled
Conspiracy by the bureaucratic, corporate, and labor elites!
But that’s not it
Toxie’s got some new sidekicks

Adopted 500 pound Lardass as his ward
Appetite the size of the vagina of a whore
In league with Madcowboy, Dolphin Man,
And SGT. KABUKIMAN NYPD!

Chorus:

He’s the Toxic Avenger
Saving the world from evil and pollution

He’s the Toxic Avenger
Makin’ love to his melon-heavy woman

He’s the Toxic Avenger
Now only left with a has-been Kabukiman at his side

He’s the Toxic Avenger
On the horizon he and his new offspring will ride

Pre-chorus

[Solo: Alex Fidel]
[Solo: Rob Bachman]

Trapped in alternated universes
Noxie plants his chunky dick snot in Sarah
Toxie has to get back in time to save her

Toxie is confused in the land of evil
Guiding kids from the Tromaville School
Has to get home
before the birth of his baby

Noxie kills the League of Tromaville Heros
Except for Kabukiman,
Staggers drunk into Toxie’s shack
Pisses and passes out on Sarah
His dragon passes through Sarah’s hoop of Jupiter
And now Sarah’s got triplets
Good beats evil
And Noxie is reborn!! OH NO!

Pre-chorus

Chorus


HE’S THE TOXIC AVENGER!!!!!!

And he’s Tromaville’s favorite hideously deformed creature of superhuman size and strength

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