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M / Mary Lambert / Lay Your Head Down


Lay your head down
Lay your head down
Lay your head down on me

What is the state of your heart?
Is it concave?
Are you awake?

Sometimes when I cry
I start to cry harder simply because I am crying
Or because I know that in the world
Somewhere there are little girls that are wearing tutus
And singing Christmas songs
Or because there are actual Shar Pei puppies that look like rolled up towels
Or because on the internet, you can find pictures of pigs in rain boots
You can find anything on the internet
That is so cool
Or I cry because Sarah McLaughlin comes onto my TV
And sings to animals who don't have homes
(Fuck you Sarah McLaughlin)
(Just kidding, I love you Sarah McLaughlin)
Sometimes I cry when cheese is really good
Or when I've cut onions (but that's just human)
I cry when there is no end and I cry because there is an end
And I cry because you love me so well
And I cry because I gave my love to other people before you
And I cry because I used to cry alone because I wanted to die
I cry because the sunset is so beautiful on the Connecticut river
I cry because I am scared I am losing my mind
I cry because I'm on meds or because I forgot my meds
Or I'm crying for the fact I'm crying because I forgot my meds
And does this I mean actually myself?
And I am crying because maybe I am myself
And that doesn't feel like enough

Lay your head down
Lay your head down
Lay your head down on me

What is the state of your heart?
Is it concave?
Are you awake?

I cry because sometimes my only power feels like tweeting a hashtag,
And that is so vapid and useless
Or I cry because I am human and I'm connected
And there is immense sadness in the world
I cry because humanity is frightening
Because one person consumed with self-hatred and armed with one gun
Can kill an entire room of people
I cry because shame propels so many of us
I cry because so many people forget how important it is to cry
Or made to feel weak when they do
I cry because I want to close my eyes
I cry because I can't
And I cry because there is also good
There's also chocolate cake and love and Harry Potter
And the brilliant gasps of magic of holding a hand
And hammocks
I love hammocks
I cry because it is late in the Summer and all the fireflies are winking at me
And the moon is out and it wants nothing from me
I cry because my heart used to be an atlas with all the continents cut out
I cry because I am full now and sure and say yes when I mean yes, and no when I mean no
And can love you with all of my breath
I cry because I am so well
Because I live so well
And how could one person possibly be so fortunate to live with all of this light

Lay your head down
Lay your head down
Lay your head down on me
Lay your head down
Lay your head down
Lay your head down on me
What is the state of your heart?
Is it concave?
Are you awake?
Stay awake
Stay awake
Stay awake
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