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This morning it occurred to me i might not look quite like a natural blonde,
And i can't help, but feel conned,
The picture on the packet showed a model with no baggage,
Promising wild sex and marriage with a big color chart wand,

This morning it occurred to me,
I never will quite have a supermodel's legs,
(never in a million years!),
Unless i cut each one in half,
Become half an octopus, the two become synonymous,
With cocaine glamour, riches, beauty, and crack,

I took a trip to the national gallery,
For something more refreshing in what ruben saw,

My supermodel's legs, think they were plucked from a rubenesque world,
My supermodel's legs look pretty crap on a 5 foot 4 girl,
Women, men, and inbetween's--why don't you just stop dieting?
Go bake! eat cake! go cheer! drink beer!
Worrying is b-boring!
If people said eat loads of cake,
Zou wouldn't want much anyway,
And then you would've stuffed your face and look like king henry the 8th,

Present, we’re told off every day for living our lives the wrong damn way,
'Suck my left one,' is what I say, if i want six coffees a day!

Women, men, and inbetween's--why don't you just stop dieting?
Go bake! eat cake! go cheer! drink beer!
Worrying is boring me.

Oh, I get more turned on by pink cupcakes than heroin
Not rock and roll, i’m much more mary poppins
Oh, supermodel’s legs, they never held up much weight in my world
Oh, supermodel’s legs, 'cos women should be women
Girls should be allowed to be girls

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