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K / Key of Awesome / Telephone (parody)


[Lady Gaga]
What do you say, BK?

[Beyoncé]
You gonna tell me the concept of this telephone video or what?

[Lady Gaga]
Well...

First of all, this song is not as good as 'Bad Romance'
And it's not even close to 'Poker Face' or 'Just Dance'
So I will distract them by getting half naked
And throw everything at them but the kitchen sink, sink
The kitchen sink, sink
What do you think, think?
I will prove that I don’t have a penis, wink, wink

First I'll get stripped naked by some burly prison guards
Then make out with a shemale in the prison yard, yard

[Beyoncé]
This video seems goofy, you should just do it alone
Besides, I’m getting sick of all these songs about phones

[Lady Gaga]
Bail me out of jail, then we pause for some bad dialogue
We poison everyone, including a cute duck
Then we start to dance and there’s dead people everywhere
As usual, I'll have lots crazy crap in my hair

P-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-product placement
Hide the d-dead bodies in the b-b-basement

Blood and guts and boobs and buts
And I just want to make your head explode

Beep beep beep b-b-beep beep beep
That was 'Lady Gaga' in Morse code

[Beyoncé]
If you think I'm doing this
Then you’re a crazy bastard
You must've blown a gasket
Are you trippin' on acid?
As a child were you abused by some big crazy bastard?
And did he ever make you place the lotion in the basket?

I just want to do a simple shoot with dancing
You used to be a diva, now you’re Marilyn Manson

[Lady Gaga]
You’re gonna do my video and do it my way
I’d hate for something bad to happen to your family

[Beyoncé]
My family-ay?

[Lady Gaga]
That’s right, Beyonce!
A piano might accidentally fall on Jay-Z

[Beyoncé]
Somebody help me, cause I don’t wanna sing anymore
She's got a gun to my head on the dancefloor

[Lady Gaga]
Rub-ah-dub-dub, three nuns in a tub
And their doin' it with a garden gnome

[Beyoncé]
Please don’t beat me up but I have to ask what
does that have to do with a telephone?

You crazy bitch, aaaaah!
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