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So I heard another boy went missing, the poor kid
Not to be poignant, but I wish I'd ignored it
Cause I didn't even believe in witches before this
But now it's time to get my pitchfork and a torch it's-
Three o'clock in the morning
I probably ought to be snoring
Instead I'm getting lost in the forest
Don't call me Goldilocks, I don't want any porridge
Like I give a fuck which bowl's the coldest, hottest or warmest
I got bigger problems, should've gotten insurance
For this trip, cause now I'm missing, someone report it
Sure hope the cops brought a lot of chalk for my corpse, if-
They find it it'll be divided up into portions
Chopped and tossed into a bubbling cauldron
Along with body parts possibly belonging to orphans
The moment that you start running low on your resources
You're only on survival mode, totally robbed of endorphins
I've stumbled upon a cacophonous chorus
Of the awfullest noises, there's a knot in my organs
But I got my dog at least, and I keep him off the leash
If he's barking up a tree then you don't wanna ignore him
I've got a feeling there's some ominous force, this-
Godforsaken nature walk couldn't be farther from boring
I found a house with every orifice boarded
I think it might be haunted, should I knock on the door? WITCH!

Who's gonna get your goosebumps bumping?
Don't put me in a corner
Hair raiser, got your heart-rate pumping
Don't put me in a corner
Roll Camera, hope your nose is running
Got a tissue? cause I really could afford one
Turn around I wanna show you something
No thanks, I'm looking at the corner

Staring at the wallpaper, cause I adore it
But I think the support beams need some reinforcement
This shithole's a little more more than just a fixer upper
If I were you I'd put it on the market, get another
You could probably find a squatter, or list it for rent
But if you move Mrs Witch, tell me which way you went
Cause I don't need to see you, I can picture it in my head
I mean look at me, I'm already pitching a tent
I know I never should've been holding her totem
I saw the writing on the wall, but I don't know who wrote 'em
I really thought I had balls, but I'm not so bold in the scrotum
I wanna go home and crack open a cold one
Military training didn't prepare me at all
I'm converting my K9 into a therapy dog
Come here Bullet, stay put and wide awake until daytime
With daddy in the corner, we'll be watching the paint dry

Who's gonna get your goosebumps bumping?
Don't put me in a corner
Hair raiser, got your heart-rate pumping
Don't put me in a corner
Roll Camera, hope your nose is running
Got a tissue? cause I really could afford one
Turn around I wanna show you something
No thanks, I'm looking at the corner

Yo, Goldilocks, you better be scared bitch
This predicament's worse than your three bears sitch
It's time out for you, does that seem fair kids?
Unless you dare turn to face me, the Blair Witch
I'm gonna make you take a walk down memory lane
Cause I'm a devil manifesting your shame
Remember everything wretched, you're getting less and less sane
You're never finding the exit when I am letting you stay
Setting the stage and you've been cast in a play
The final act is beginning and it's a tragedy, yay
You want someone to blame for all this? Take a hint, dunce
Go sit in the corner, forget the witch hunts
Listen to my voice, follow the call
If you simply give it time, promise you'll become enthralled
I see it in your eyes, you don't wanna die at all
But telling me to stop? Better off talking to a wall

Who's gonna get your goosebumps bumping?
Don't put me in a corner
Hair raiser, got your heart-rate pumping
Don't put me in a corner
Roll Camera, hope your nose is running
Got a tissue? cause I really could afford one
Turn around I wanna show you something
No thanks, I'm looking at the corner

Don't put me in a corner
Don't put me in a corner
Don't put me in a corner
Did I mention I'm Naked?
Woh, really? AHHHGGH!!!

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