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I wanna tell you all the story
'Bout the Harper Valley widow wife
Who had a teenage daughter
Who attended Harper Valley Junior High

Well, her daughter came home one afternoon
She didn't even stop to play
She said: "Mom I got a note here
From the Harper Valley P.T.A."

The note said: "Mrs Johnson
You're wearin' your dresses way too high
It's reported you've been drinkin'
And a runnin' round with men and goin' wild"

"And we don't believe you oughta be
A bringin' up your little girl this way"
It was signed by the secretary
Harper Valley P.T.A.

Well, it happened that the P.T.A.
Was gonna meet that very afternoon
And they were sure surprised
When Mrs Johnson wore her miniskirt into the room

As she walked up to the blackboard
I can still recall the words she had to say
She said: "I'd like to address this meeting
Of the Harper Valley P.T.A."

"Well, there's Bobby Taylor sittin' there
And seven times he's asked me for a date
And Mrs Taylor sure seems to use a lot of ice
Whenever he's away"

"Oh, Mr Baker could you tell us
Why your secretary had to leave this town
And shouldn't widow Jones be told
To keep her window shades all pulled completely down"

"Well, Mr Harper couldn't be here
'Cause he stayed too long at Tootsie's Bar again
And if you smell Shirley Thompson's breath
You'll find she's had a little nip of gin"

"Then you have the nerve to tell me
You think that as a mother I'm not fit
Well, this is just a another Peyton Place
And you're all Harper Valley hypocrites"

Oh no, I wouldn't put you on
Because it really did it happened just this way
The day my mama socket it to the Harper Valley P.T.A.
The day my mama socket it to the Harper Valley P.T.A.

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