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J / Janis Ian / Welcome to Acousticville


It was a long, long road
It was a big deep hole
and then the axle broke
I barely had time to work up a sweat
when my poor Corvette went up in smoke
I was glued to the seat, I was dying of the heat
Then the water jug spilled
right onto the desert sand
I got down on my hands and knees
and said "Do what you will"
There was a voice from the dunes
In the noonday sun
She handed me a pamphlet
Said "Make sure you read it"
and started back the way she had come
It said - Welcome to Acousticville
Welcome to the place where time stands still
You can drink your blues neat or on ice
You can pay your dues any way you like
Welcome to Acousticville
It was a big mirage,
or maybe her garage
just looked like a Motel Six
She checked me in over there
wearing nothing but her hair
and a couple of candlesticks
She had long, long teeth
It was a huge relief that my door had a chain
It was an ordinary bed
It had a sign that said "You can steal this stain"
Not an outlet in sight, not a lamp, not a light
and it was coming on night
I was sleeping on the floor
when she slithered through the door
and whispered "Baby did you lose your appetite"
She said - Welcome to Acousticville
Welcome to the place where time stands still
Ain't no bass, ain't no drums
Ain't no waste, just two opposable thumbs
Welcome to Acousticville
Gary Davis, Sippie Wallace, Furry Lewis
Muddy Waters they were laying by the pool
Robert Johnson, Libba Cotton, Willie Dixon
Charlie Christian and his children, too
In between the lotion and chlorine,
Jimi Hendrix played a Martin D-18,
and we all joined in as he began to scream
"Welcome to Acousticville"
I had a real good time
Good food, good wine
I got my appetite back
But whenever I told her I wanted to leave,
she'd get so mean,
she'd peel the paint off a Cadillac
"Wait a minute!" I said,
"I don't recall being dead,
"though I am white as a ghost"
She looked me right in the eye
Said "You think you're alive,
"but baby, God only knows"
And that's the thing I love about the blues
You can't predict who it is gonna choose
but it's an honor that you really can't refuse
Welcome to Acousticville
Welcome to Acousticville
Welcome to Acousticville...
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