Beloved, we are gathered here today
To mourn the passing of common sense
Beautiful it was, this precious gift
It's untimely death has caused us grief
Stabbed to death by political correctness
And humans who choose to cease all brain activity
Common sense, we mourn your death
You shall remain in our hearts and memories
Your death has caused humanity to regress
Back into a primitive carnal state
Our hope is that you will be resurrected
From this grave that binds you

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