[CLAUDE] Now there's a solemn, old tradition For admission - or audition - to Transition from a come from away
[COMPANY] To be a Newfoundlander
[CLAUDE] The only other way at any rate Is pass away and pray to fate and Wait to reincarnate
[COMPANY] As a Newfoundlander Hey hey, come on inside Nothing ventured nothing tried
[WOMAN] Only a couple of people cried
[COMPANY] You'll be a Newfoundlander Hey hey, sit down right here You'll feel better in a year
[MAN] Try to ignore your doubts and fears
[COMPANY] And you'll be a Newfoundlander
[CLAUDE, spoken] Now we needs a couple volunteers - who wants to become a Newfoundlander?
[BOB, spoken] Right here!
[CLAUDE, spoken] Good man! Who else?
[KEVIN T, spoken] I have no idea why I put up my hand. And Kevin's like
[KEVIN J, spoken] Oh my God, are you serious? Oh my God, you ARE serious.
[KEVIN T, spoken] Yes, I'm serious. Don't do it if you don't want to
[KEVIN J, spoken] I won't.
[CLAUDE, spoken] Where you from, buddy?
[KEVIN T, spoken] Los Angeles
[CLAUDE, spoken] LA! Who else?
[DIANE, spoken] Us! We want to be Newfoundlanders!
[CLAUDE, spoken] Alright. Where are you folks from?
[DIANE, spoken] Texas and-
[CLAUDE, spoken] Texas! (to NICK) What part of Texas are you from, buddy?
[NICK, spoken] No, I'm from-
[DIANE, spoken] No, I'M from Texas. He's from England.
[CLAUDE, spoken] Wait. Now how does that work?
[NICK, spoken] How does what work?
[CLAUDE, spoken] Well, how does your marriage work with you being in England and her in Texas?
[DIANE & NICK, spoken] No, we're not married!
[CLAUDE, spoken] Oh, I'm sorry, I just assumed you were married. Well, would you like to be?
[NICK, spoken] Ah...
[DIANE, spoken] Well, why not?!
[NICK, spoken] Diane had had two beers by then, so it was probably the alcohol talking.
[DIANE, spoken] I've never had more than one beer at a time before, so it was probably the alcohol talking.
[NICK, spoken] I went and got her two more beers.
[CLAUDE] Now the first part is the easiest We'll soon get to the queasiest I'll need you to repeat this mess
[COMPANY] When you become a Newfoundlander
[CLAUDE] Cause we speaks a different language, son We adds some esses and some rum You'll have to try a good cod tongue
[COMPANY] When you become a Newfoundlander Hey hey, just do your best Nothing scary, nothing yet
[WOMAN] You'll have to change the way you're dressed
[COMPANY] And you'll be a Newfoundlander Hey hey, just sing along Nothing ventured just prolonged
[CLAUDE] There's thirty verses in this song
[COMPANY] Then you'll be a Newfoundlander
[CLAUDE, spoken] Ladies and Gentlemen. This is screech! Back in World War 2, an officer was stationed here and was offered some of this stuff. All the locals were tossing it back with nar' a quiver, so he does too, and lets out an ear piercing (all the locals howl) Everybody comes to see what's happening and says
[ALL except SCREECHES, spoken] "What was that ungodly screech?!"
[CLAUDE, spoken] And now it's your turn. Are you ready?
[NICK, spoken] Um... I'm not sure that-
[DIANE, spoken] Wait, did you just say...
[BOB, spoken] No. Nope. Not really ready
[KEVIN T, spoken] Do we have to drink this?
[CLAUDE, spoken] Good! All together now. One!
[ALL except SCREECHEES, spoken] ONE!
[CLAUDE, spoken] Two!
[ALL except SCREECHEES, spoken] TWO!
[CLAUDE, spoken] Three!
[ALL except SCREECHEES, spoken] THREE!
[CLAUDE, spoken] Down the hatch!
[KEVIN T, spoken] Screech is basically bad Jamaican rum.
[NICK, spoken] Screech is horrific.
[DIANE, spoken] Screech is delishush!
[BOB, spoken] And then they brought the Cod.
[KEVIN T, spoken] The Cod...
[NICK, spoken] The Cod...
[DIANE, spoken] The Cod!
[CLAUDE] Now with every transformation Comes a tiny bit of risk You've got to walk the plank And there'll be blood or there'll be bliss And it's the same to be a Newfoundlander. Every person's wish So don't be dumb, just take the plunge Go on - kiss the fish!
[NEWFOUNDLANDERS] (continued underneath] I'm an islander, I am an islander I'm an islander, I am an islander...
[CLAUDE, spoken] Ladies and gentlemen, this is a genuine freshly caught Newfoundland Cod. And if you want to become an honorary Newfoundlander, you'll have to give her a smooch! One!
[KEVIN J, spoken] If you kiss that I am never kissing you again!
[KEVIN T, spoken] I'll risk it!
[CLAUDE, spoken] Two!
[NICK, spoken] I'm not kissing a fish!
[DIANE, spoken] Come on, I will if you will!
[NICK, spoken] Oh my God. Fine!
[CLAUDE, spoken] Three!
[DIANE, spoken] I can't do it!
[NICK, spoken] What? I just did!
[CLAUDE, spoken] Now you've got to kiss the cod. It's a vital part of the ceremony.
[DIANE, spoken] I can't do it!
[CLAUDE, spoken] Alrigh, look. I'll make you a deal. Either you kiss this fish... or else you kiss this Englishman that you're not married to.
[COMPANY] Hey hey, come on tonight Take a risk and take a ride Jump right in with both feet tied And you'll be a Newfoundlander Hey hey, come on once more Nothing ventured nothing sore After it's over, out the door And you'll be a Newfoundlander
[CLAUDE] After it's over you'll remember
[COMPANY] That you're a Newfoundlander!Teksty umieszczone na naszej stronie są własnością wytwórni, wykonawców, osób mających do nich prawa.
