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beer activated girl
sitting on my couch, likes to watch Sports World
i just giver her beer and she comes to life
doesn't like Real World
this is why I love my beer activated girl.

she's not plastic or too spastic
very loving not dramatic
who could ever ever ask for more
love with tasty beer goodness galore
just one purse no shoes to choose from
no more "do I have a big bum?"
no more "does this dress make me look fat?"
she will never want to own a cat...

beer activated girl
inside of my heart she has found the pearl
will not diss on my friends Bay Watch does not offend
poker nights a go and I'll never drink alone
oh yes poker nights a go and I'll never drink alone
no and I'll never drink alone
no and I'll never drink alone
no and I'll never drink alone
no and I'll never drink alone
not with my beer activated girl

I met her on a brewery tour I love her
she can tell the difference between ale and lager
you'll not extract me from this beery fantasy
I can make homebrew and she'll never ask me
to pick up a chick flick at Blockbuster for her
and I'll never hear "nothing" if I ask what's wrong
if I screw up she'll just tell me what I goofed up on
there won't be big fights
like where were you last night
I waited up for you
why didn't you notice
my new haircut
slingback shoes
two pounds lost
fancy bra
new lip gloss
painted nails
choice of soup
fridge cozy
dental floss
clean baseboards
new nylons
manicure
pedicure
great lip wax
size 2 slacks
toothbrush rack
not from my beer activated girl

and since I have to just choose one
for my life she is the right one
no silicon bitch could be her match
I can even f**k her in the a$$

beer activated girl
she may not be real attracted to chicks
but I know she feels like she'd like to try
isn't that da bom? that is why I love
my beer activated girl
with her hot phone sex operator voice
saying that she wants me
she's not wearing panties
straight and to the point
that is why I love my
beer activated girl

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