I found myself a castaway
On a haunted desert isle
I thought myself alone at first
Until I heard the crooning sounds of evil plastic mouths

Ten tiny plastic demonspawns
Came marching hungrily
Their twenty eyes are locked on me
Oh shit, please don’t let me be a TP casualty

I hear a voice asking me to walk among them
I run, but soon the hellhounds are on my trail
Bred for hate, their cold hearts pumping wolf’s blood
Let’s hope my Nikes are ready to a go go!

In moments they’re upon me
I struggle as they bite
My ghostly figure crimson
Maternal permission given to kill tonight!

The devilocks tear at my skin
I can’t escape this violent world
The last caress a fatal blow?
I look for an angel, fuck, there’s not one to be found

Suddenly they stop the beating
Their horrific business ceased
A black-winged savior casts its shadow
The true leader come to reclaim his throne

He reaches out a muscled arm
It seems to save my withered form
But his red eyes tell a different story
A single punch to the stomach brings a cough… cool

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