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We get to break out of prison
Make love to our best friend's wife
Have a beer for breakfast in Boston
Drink rum in Jamaica that night
We get to tell all our secrets
In a code no one understands
We get to shoot all the bad guys
And never get blood on our hands

We're heroes, we're schemers
We're drunks, we're dreamers
We're lovers and sometimes we're fighters
We're students, we're teachers
We're the Devil, we're preachers
We're true love, but mostly one-nighters
We're the songwriters

Half of the world thinks we're crazy
The other half wants to be us
They're jealous 'cause we get to hang out
In the back of some big star's tour bus
We're old boots and t-shirts and blue jeans
We're capos and strings and E chords
We only dress up in November
When they hand out songwriters' awards

We're heroes, we're schemers
We're the drunks, we're the dreamers
We're lovers, and sometimes we're fighters
We're the truth, we're the lies
We're stupid, we're wise
We're true love, but mostly one-nighters
We're the songwriters

We write bridges, cross 'em and burn 'em
Teach lessons but don't bother to learn 'em
Our mamas don't know what we're doing
Or why we stay out all night long
I told mine I was a drug dealer
She said: "Thank God, you ain't writing songs"

We're heroes, we're dreamers
We're drunks, we're schemers
We're lovers, and sometimes we're fighters
We're the students, we're the teachers
We're the Devil, we're preachers
We're true love, but mostly one-nighters
We're the songwriters

[Spoken:]
Hey, you know the difference between a large pizza and a songwriter?
- A large pizza can feed a family of four!
Somebody asked me why I wrote this song
- I said: "Well, I'm the only one that knew the words"

Ain't we having a good time?...

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