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B / Beguiler / Black Cloud


Breathless day by day
It gets harder to exhale
Breath by breath
I feel my lungs closer to
Closer to collapse
From distrust my chest is hollow
My world is caving in
The walls are enclosing me
When I look in the mirror, and your face is staring back at me
Those last days will forever trail me
In my dreams I will be taken back
To when I watched your final breath
Leave your chest
Sick and dying
That image is most vivid
The way out it's an ugly fucking bitch
Your life is over I've felt cold ever since
With you dead it's hard to give a shit
My privileges I honour
And that is why I'm fucking here
Despite everything I have to aspire
I can't help ruining my own life
The drop from here to hell
Is what I'll live with
Before you start stop yourself
Save it for someone else
I know that I'm not well I gave up
I'm run down this is my burden
I don't want your fucking help
I wouldn't want to know me I'd pick someone else
I don't know why my mind resonates with the worst of times
Everyday all I feel Is this burn
I wish I knew why it feels so good
Maybe I'm a narcissist
Maybe in your eyes I am selfish
Everyone relates to trauma
Some will understand better than others
When it cycles this is how it is
It's a black cloud, and everyday is piss
When you think it can't get any worse,
Oh it happens, Oh it happens
Fuck
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