[THE SQUIP] Take your hands out of your pockets Arch your back, puff out your chest Add some swagger to your gate or You'll look like a masturbator Fix your posture, then the rest
[JEREMY] But I AM a masturbator--
[THE SQUIP] We'll fix that. All your nerdiness is ugly
[JEREMY] Nerd? I thought I was more of a geek, but--
[THE SQUIP] All your stammering's a chore
[JEREMY] Wh-wh-what?
[THE SQUIP] Your tics and fidgets are persistent And your charm is non-existent Fix your vibe, then fix some more
[JEREMY] Buh--
[THE SQUIP] Buh!
[JEREMY] I--
[THE SQUIP] Shut!
[JEREMY] Wha?
[THE SQUIP] No
[JEREMY] Aah!
[THE SQUIP] Stop Oh, everything about you is so terrible Whoa, everything about you makes me wanna die
[JEREMY] Jesus Christ...
[THE SQUIP] So don't freak out And don't resist And have no doubt If I assist You will Be more chill First thing's first, go buy a new shirt
[JEREMY] What's wrong with my shirt--
[THE SQUIP] It's better if you just comply My job's to color your aesthetic And make you seem much less pathetic Just step and fetch, don't ask me why
[JEREMY] How are you with math homework?
[THE SQUIP] I' m a super-computer, Jeremy. I'm made of math. Oh, everything about you is so terrible
[PEOPLE IN THE MALL] Everything about you sucks! Everything about you sucks!
[THE SQUIP] Whoa, everything about you makes me wanna die
[PEOPLE IN THE MALL] Everything about you sucks! Everything about you sucks!
[THE SQUIP] All the people in the mall think you're such a slob
[PEOPLE IN THE MALL] You're a slob! Terrible! Such a slob!
[THE SQUIP] And boy, can I see why! Now you try picking a shirt. That's a girl's shirt.
[JEREMY] Sorry...
[CHLOE] ...Jerry?
[JEREMY] Jeremy.
[CHLOE] You shop here?
[JEREMY] Oh, yeah all the time--
[THE SQUIP] Never.
[JEREMY] Never. Is what I meant to...
[THE SQUIP] Greet the beta.
[JEREMY] Oh. Hey, Brooke.
[THE SQUIP] "You look sexy."
[JEREMY] I can't say that to a hot girl!
[THE SQUIP] Don't smile. Stare intensely. Speak like you don't care about your own death.
[JEREMY] Lookin' pretty sexy, Brooke.
[BROOKE] Thanks.
[CHLOE] Is that a girl's shirt?
[JEREMY] No.
[THE SQUIP] "Yes."
[JEREMY] Yes.
[THE SQUIP] Repeat after me-- I saw it in the window And I couldn't dismiss
[JEREMY] I saw it in the window And I couldn't dismiss
[THE SQUIP] I was dating a girl and She had a shirt just like this
[JEREMY] I was dating a girl and She had a shirt just like this
[THE SQUIP] It's still painful
[JEREMY] It's still painful
[CHLOE] So, who was this mystery girl?
[JEREMY] Oh, you've probably never heard of her, so--
[THE SQUIP] Madeline
[JEREMY] Madeline
[CHLOE] What?
[JEREMY] She's French
[CHLOE] Ugh! She is NOT French! She just pretends to be for attention!
[BROOKE] Madeline broke up with you?
[JEREMY] Yeah...
[THE SQUIP] No.
[JEREMY] I mean--
[THE SQUIP] I broke up with her
[JEREMY] I broke up with her
[THE SQUIP] 'Cause she was Cheating on me
[JEREMY, overselling it] 'Cause she was Cheating on me
[THE SQUIP] Hey, Hamlet. Be. More. Chill.Teksty umieszczone na naszej stronie są własnością wytwórni, wykonawców, osób mających do nich prawa.
