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In every town he visits
He thinks that he's the best.
New York, London, Chicago,
I've forgotten all the rest.

Who am I talking about?
With blue eyes, cold and wet
The darling of big business
The darling of the blue-rinse set.

Johnny Fontaine would hate this song,
Even after all the trash he's done.
He swears on the show-biz bible.
He makes his money suing for libel.

Performs at the Whitehouse
Is up for president
He mixes with upper-class people
And even with those who're bent

Now this man's appeared in
The worst films ever made.
Even the worst B-movies
Put his ones to shame

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